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REFORMING MARRIAGE: IT'S ALL ABOUT GOD Daniel Patz, Lead Pastor Grace Church, Sunday Worship 1 Corinthians 8:6; Romans 11:36; Colossians 1:16; Hebrews 2:10 February 14th, 2010
1 Corinthians 8:6 Yet for us there is one God, the Father, from whom are all things and for whom we exist, and one Lord, Jesus Christ, through whom are all things and through whom we exist. (ESV)
Romans 11:36 For from him and through him and to him are all things. To him be glory forever. Amen. (ESV)
Colossians 1:16 For by him all things were created, in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or dominions or rulers or authorities--all things were created through him and for him. (ESV)
Hebrews 2:10 For it was fitting that he, for whom and by whom all things exist, in bringing many sons to glory, should make the founder of their salvation perfect through suffering. (ESV)
What It’s All About? Valentine’s Day - do we really know what it is about? Flowers, hearts, chocolates, romance, love, “valentines”? Do we know who St. Valentine was? He was two men – both were 3rd Century priests who were martyred for their faith. Marriage? Do we really know what it is about? It’s Not About You! It’s Not Your Party? Story about a child who goes to a birthday party – multiple gifts vs. party favors (from Tripp) It’s not your party – marriage – it is God! Yet God is good – and when you let Him at the center of it all, you open the door for boundless pleasure and joy. Your going to get hammered with marriage this next month…through the marriage conference on March 12-13. 1) This morning we are looking at Reforming Marriage: It’s All About God. Preach on Suffering Next week 2) In two weeks – Reforming Marriage: The Husband as Servant-Leader 3) Week after that – Reforming Marriage: The Wife as Glorious-Helper “Reforming Marriage” What do I mean by this (other than the fact that there is a great book by this title by Douglas Wilson)? To reform means to change or transform one thing that is the current status quo to a new and better way. We need this in the church today. We need reformation in the home and it begins in the foundational relationship of the husband and wife. Foundations of Marriage (Questions we must always ask about everything – job, cooking, tv, sports, you name it)
1 Peter 4:10 [10]As each has received a gift, use it to serve one another, as good stewards of God's varied grace: (ESV) This is important - we were made to glorify God. Lewis on “Running on God.” 3. The Bible teaches that we most glorify God in our marriage when: We Love God with all our heart, soul and mind and strength Deuteronomy 6:4-5; Matthew 22:37; “Love God with your all and do what you want…” Could you write one or two pages on what it would look like in your marriage if YOU loved God? Deuteronomy 11:1 "You shall therefore love the LORD your God and keep his charge, his statutes, his rules, and his commandments always. (ESV) Deuteronomy 11:13 [13]"And if you will indeed obey my commandments that I command you today, to love the LORD your God, and to serve him with all your heart and with all your soul, (ESV) Joshua 23:11 [11]Be very careful, therefore, to love the LORD your God. (ESV) But what does this mean? Here is one way to think about it. We love God by seeking His best – His glory – relating to Him as He made us. This is the life of love and FAITH in God (Hebrews 11:6). C. S. Lewis on Being Made for God: God made us [and marriage]: invented us as a man invents an engine. A car is made to run on petrol, and it would not run properly on anything else. Now God designed the human machine [and marriage] to run on Himself. He Himself is the fuel our spirits were designed to burn, or the food our spirits were designed to feed on. There is no other. That is why it is just no good asking God to make us happy in our own way without bothering about religion. God cannot give us a happiness and peace apart from Himself, because it is not there. There is no such thing. (Mere Christianity) A. We love God by joyfully submitting to His Sovereignty as Creator and Lord over all things including our marriage (or singleness). “From Him are all things” God is our Source! My Marriage is FROM Him – what does this mean in my life and marriage? [6] yet for us there is one God, the Father, from whom are all things and for whom we exist, and one Lord, Jesus Christ, through whom are all things and through whom we exist. (ESV)
God made you and He made your spouse. God created marriage and brought you together. God is over all because everything come from Him. He gets the right to say what goes and we do not!
We love God and live by faith when we learn to submit to His Sovereign will and rejoice in His goodness as a Creator.
We say – “Your will be done…” not “my will be done in reality as it is in my fantasy.”
This means you embrace the call of know and loving God. It means you bow your life before the Word of God and learn to say – “your statues are my delight.”
It means that Husbands care to take seriously the reality that they are the Heads of their wives as Christ is of the church. They are to love and cherish their wife in a laying down their lives type of way. They are to care about the holiness of their wives and are to wash their wives with the Word of God. They are to love not because of beauty but in order to make beautiful.
This means we trust God with the stories of our pasts and look to see what God now wants us to do.
What a great exercise for you to sit down and answer this question with several pages: “What does it mean that my marriage and my spouse is from God?” Do I really believe this? Do I believe that He knows what He is doing? Can I joyfully learn to trust in Him and learn contentment and even joy in an imperfect marriage – but a marriage that God has made? B. We love God by passionately pursuing His glory as our ambition and goal in all things including our marriage (or singleness). “For Him are all things” God is our Goal! My Marriage is FOR Him – what does this mean in my life and marriage? [6] yet for us there is one God, the Father, from whom are all things and for whom we exist, and one Lord, Jesus Christ, through whom are all things and through whom we exist. (ESV)
This is so far from a churchy concept. What does it really that marriage is FOR God? Do you know?
Your marriage is not about your happiness…your glory…your success…or kingdom…your agenda…your fulfillment.
Don’t get me wrong – in God’s plan there is great happiness, success, and fulfillment in marriage – but when that is our goal we will be disappointed and devastated. Marriage was never meant to bear the load that we often give it. We think it will be our satisfier or savior to make us happy. It will not! In fact when we think it will make us happy it usually does just the opposite in the long run.
Your marriage is for God! Your sex is for God. Your communication is for God. Your commitment to stay together is for God.
You exist together to show off the splendor and majesty of God who love sacrificially, gives, forgives, shows mercy and grace, overflows with goodness, is patient, multiplies, enjoys fellowship…
If something other than God and his glory is the goal of our marriage (or our singleness) those other things become our gods – they are idols. All other idols eventually consume and destroy their worshippers.
In fact – get this – you are a worshipper. If not God, something else – all the time and in any circumstance. C. We love God by confidently trusting His power, provision and presence as our Savior and Shepherd in all things including our marriage (or singleness). “Through Him are all things.” God is our Means! My Marriage is THROUGH Him – what does that mean in my life and marriage? [6] yet for us there is one God, the Father, from whom are all things and for whom we exist, and one Lord, Jesus Christ, through whom are all things and through whom we exist. (ESV) Deuteronomy 30:6 [6]And the LORD your God will circumcise your heart and the heart of your offspring, so that you will love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul, that you may live. (ESV) It is quite possible that you are feeling overwhelmed by the high standard that I am putting on our marriages. Marriages are from God. Marriages are For God! Singleness is from God and singleness is for God. This should impact everything about us. So you may feel the despairing thoughts of – I can’t. This seems more difficult and I am more overwhelmed by my inadequacy and failings. The Gospel is your only hope. We were never meant to be our Savior...including in marriage. This news can come to you with great hope. Many marriages are lousy because they have not trusted in the One who made marriages and sustains all things. Have hope. There is probably grace and strength that you have never taped into and He offers it to you today if you will but humble yourself and cry out to him. |
